The Sheik Tugboat Story - PART 9
PART 9
6 days later
At the end of
Superstars of Wrestling
Vince McMahon
White shirt
Blue tie
Blue vest
Blue blazer
WWF logo on left breast pocket
And Roddy Piper
All fired up
Wired to the 9th degree
ROWDY as anything
Closing out the show
“Well Hot Rod!
Tomorrow night
The last stop before
WrestleMania 7
And one hundred fans
In Los Angeles
Is the Super-Stars and Stripes Forever
The team of Sgt. Slaughter
And Colonel Mustafa
Face off against
The dynamic duo of
Nikolai Volkoff
And HOOOO!!!
Hacksaw Jim Duggan
Can America finally get one
On the Fearsome Foursome?”
“These evil son of unnamed goats
Have dominated the WWF
Like no one ever before McMahon
They are evil
Making us pay through the nose
I know
Nikolai will get
Down and dirty
And Hacksaw
Will take the 2x4
And stick it where
THE SUN DON’T SHINE!”
“Well, we do know
Who will be lurking about
Tomorrow night
The World Wrestling Federation champion
SHEIK TUGBOAT
And of course
The Immortal
HULLLLKK HOGAN
Let’s hear their comments
Before Super-Stars and Stripes Forever
HOT ROD!”
---
The transition
Transitions
To the backstage area
The Iraqi Warship
In front of an Iraqi flag
Iraqi headdress on
Championship over shoulder
Serious scowl on face
“Tomorrow night
My Sargent
My Colonel
Prepare for battle
Hacksaw
Nikolai
Prepare for destruction
America
This is a precursor
To what will happen
In two weeks at
WrestleMania 7
And if the mere mortal
The Egomaniac
Hulk Hogan
Thinks he will make
An impact
I will make him pay
And if he thinks
IF HE THINKS
He’s going to one-up
This Warship
He has another thing coming
Last time was a cake walk
This time
ALL
OUT WARFARE!
And if you get involved
Trust me
I will make sure you realize
TUGBOAT AKBAR!”
---
The scene transitions
To a dark background
A man
Back to the camera
American bandana
Blonde mullet
Flowing from the back
Army vest
Army fatigues
Huffing
Puffing
24 inch pythons
Running wild
A voice
Comes out
“It’s time brother
To take Hulkamania
To the 1990s
I’m going to war, jack
All rules thrown out
All bets are off
Whatcha gonna do
Sheik Tugboat?
Whatcha
Gonna
Do?
You want war?
You’re gonna get it, brother!”
He turns around
The Hulkster with
Fatigue face paint
A snarl
Death stare
The war has now
TRULY
Been taken up a notch
Super-Stars and Stripes Forever
Is the battleground
For Stage Two
-fin-
Jon Harder
