An Ode To Road Dogg

September 5, 2017

 PHOTO CREDIT: WrestleZone.com

 

Dun dun dun

OH YOU DIDN’T KNOW

Dun dun dun

YOUR ASS BETTA CALL SOMEBODY!

 

With that one riff

A huge crowd reaction followed

A man with a microphone

And a unique look

Controlled an entire era

 

Dreadlocks tied back

A cutoff t-shirt

Baggy sweats with designs down the side

And boots with the RD front and center

Wrist taped arms

All tattooed up

And a demeanor

Of smug, cocky, and charm

All rolled into one

 

Once he entered the ring

With the fans on their feet

A microphone went to his lips

Pure gold would emanate from them

 

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN

BOYS AND GIRLS

CHILDREN OF ALL AGES

D-GENERATION X PROUDLY BRINGS TO YOU

THE R TO THE O TO THE A TO THE D

THE D TO THE O TO THE DOUBLE G

ROAD DOGG JESSE JAMES!

 

Some men are attributed to what they do in the ring

Others outside

The Road Dogg was both

The Attitude Era is always discussed

For a lot of the insanity that happened on live TV

However

The Road Dogg was one of those characters

That is sometimes overlooked

For the success he brought to that time period

 

A famous member of the Armstrong clan

Road Dogg grew up under the tutelage of the legendary

Bullet Bob

Had an education growing up in Southern Style

Gained his PhD in the United States Marine Corps

A true man’s man

Along with his brothers Scott, Steve, and the late, great Brad

Road Dogg had the world of potential

Although not the greatest catch-as-catch-can

The D-O-G-G oozed charisma through his pores

 

He made it to the WWF in 1994

As Jeff Jarrett’s “Roadie”

Even helping Double J winning the Intercontinental championship

But being second fiddle

Wasn’t for him long

Unlike Double J

The Roadie DID SING “With My Baby Tonight”

And the microphone

Got him up and running

When 1996 rolled around

However through the middle of 1997

The singing down the aisle

Grew stagnant with the Universe

 

It wasn’t until Shotgun Saturday Night

In October 1997

When after a months long rivalry

Jesse JamMes and Rockabilly

Ended their riff

And due to one guitar shot

To the cranium of the Honky Tonk Man

The New Age Outlaws were born

Add in a lethal injection of Attitude

The greatest tag team of the golden era of wrestling

Were shot to the moon

 

5 Tag Team Titles and joining DX later

The Outlaws became one of the WWF’s greatest teams

Displaying utter domination

Over every single tag team that came down the path

The Road Dogg’s mouth

And Billy Gunn’s muscle

Made for a total cohesive pair

 

Yet during this time

The WWF tried to turn Mr. Ass into a main event superstar

When the team was split up in the spring of 1999

However it was the Road Dogg

Who broke out as the biggest entity

In the eyes of the fans

In my opinion

Jesse James held the crowd in the palm of his hands

And the wrong Outlaw

Was given the wrong opportunity

 

Everything inside the ring Road Dogg did

Was not a wasted moment

One jab

Two jab

Three jab

A unique dance move

Right haymaker to the dome

Bounces off the ropes

A Shake, Rattle, and Kneedrop

A pickup and reverse waistlock

Pump handle setup

Pelvic thrust from behind

Which JR screamed “Doggy Style” from the commentary desk

And then a slam down

The Road Dogg would be victorious

 

The singles accomplishments speak for themselves

Undefeated reign as Hardcore Champion

Successfully defending the Intercontinental Championship at WrestleMania XV

Technically owns the rights to DX with X-Pac

Invented the Dogg Pound match

 

But it was the fans that hung on every word

Every movement

Every move

Everything that did not work with Mr. Ass

Worked completely with the Road Dogg

As a on-screen character

There was so much left on the bone

For Road Dogg left to do

 

For me as a fan

2000 was a let down for Road Dogg

Being a McMahon-Helmsley soldier

And falling in the background

The low point was at SummerSlam

Getting kicked in the groin

Losing to X-Pac

It looked as if Road Dogg was lost

Until he found K-Kwik

And on Sunday Night Heat

At WWF New York

They KILLED it Gettin’ Rowdy

And formed a cool tag team

Even getting a title shot at Armageddon in December

It looked like a new vision creatively for the D-O-G-G

 

Sadly the Road Dogg had his demons

And left the WWF at the peak of the Attitude Era in 2001

Thankfully

He has cleaned up

And is the MAN at the head of creativity

Writing SmackDown Live

He even found a way

After being one of 3 in a Kru

Forming a Gang with another James

And starting a Mafia with his Voodoo Kin

Back onto WWE TV

Reforming the Outlaws

And winning the WWE Tag Team Titles in 2014

 

But the legendary moments he was involved in

From being B-Lo and Vince

To smashing the Headbangers with a boom box

From pushing Cactus and Funk off the stage in a dumpster

To successfully defended the Hardcore Title against Mankind

Going tit-for-tat on the microphone

With Chris Jericho at SummerSlam 99

Piledriving Al Snow in the snow

Taking a leak on DOA’s motorcycles

Pulling a fast one in a triple threat tag team title match

Invading the Norfolk Scope

Helping X-Pac make Kane say his first word

Without the electrolarynx

“SUUUCCK ITTT”

Most of all

He made the transition from country singer

To hip hop rapper

Within a three year span

And it was SEAMLESS

 

The bottom line

The Road Dogg is an underrated performer

And is sometimes overlooked

As a focal point of the Attitude Era

He was more than DX

More than a New Age Outlaw

More than a HHH henchman

He was the most popular “gimmick” of the time

And there is no doubt about that.

 

AND IF YOU AIN’T DOWN WITH THAT

I GOT TWO WORDS FOR YA…

 

You know what they are.

 

Jon Harder

jon@thejonharder.com

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